It is January 26, 2026. I am eating oatmeal with blueberries and chia seeds. Cross-legged sitting in a chair. I am in my apartment.
How to start this next blog post? For starters, I feel okay. I have always felt jumpy, nervous, and if I moved too “this way or that way”, I would fall apart and everything would come crashing down. That has been how my nervous system operated for the last half dozen years. It doesn’t become evident until it becomes evident. Yes, real revolutionary stuff.
How can you know what you are saying, writing, doing, or simply existing at a baseline level is right? Will there be intuition that shows up as a clear and obvious green light from the universe?
“Yes, congratulations, please continue to do what you are doing”.
I do not know if such a concept exists. It seems too clean and simple. Is it possible for your nervous system to believe that when it has been conditioned to believe the opposite for so long?
Some concepts that do resonate with me:
Quiet effort. Prolong wanting exhausting itself. Urgency replaced – not quite by clarity, but something unrefined. Fuzzier. Murkier. Real? Tangible?
Coherence tends to arrive sideways. I imagine a visual representation of liminality. One foot beyond a door threshold, hands grasping the frame, poking my head out – looking around.
“Hello..? Is it chill to be looking over here? May I pass through?”.
If coherence tends to arrive sideways, will I not have to pass through such threshold in totality to be fully hit by coherence? Otherwise, the threshold and door would block a portion, and my head would simply get knocked off.
